Introduction
When we find ourselves lost in this world. When it seems like breaking every plate out of frustration. When it seems like we are lacking. When the world and life are harsh on us. Here, when we feel so stuck and lost. When we feel like we can’t handle it anymore. When it feels like we can’t go on. Where will you go?
Learning how to deal with feeling like a failure in life begins with understanding that failure and identity are not the same thing.
Tell me, do you find yourself so weak? Do you find yourself so incapable? What to do when no motivation and no guru helps? When you can see your life in a mess, when you can feel the fear in your heart, the guilt of your mistakes and naivety in every part of your being. Tell me, what do you do then?
Table of Contents
Will you end up blaming and holding resentment and guilt in your heart?
Do you go around with these feelings lingering in your heart forever?
Tell me, when all these feelings shall engulf you like the ghosts that refuse to leave you, no matter how hard you try. Its shadows haunt you as you open your eyes to begin your day, as you sleep, sit, or try to do anything.
Tell me, how do you go around fighting them all?
How to Deal with Feeling Like a Failure in Life?
You don’t run from your feelings. You don’t hide. You don’t do anything.
You go around a corner and sit with the ghost.
You go around and sit with it in the darkness.
No matter how strong it tries to be, you sit with it.
You see it like it’s the only thing you want to see.
You exist with it like it’s the only thing that exists.
You don’t fight it. You don’t ask it to go away. You don’t ask it to stay. You only stay with it, and not just once, but day in and day out.
Like we let our bodies go sore as we build our beautiful bodies in the gym? Endure this pain like it shall remain a temporary guest.
But never, expect it to remain temporary or permanent.
Embrace every challenge
You’ve had several plans and dreams for your life. You see the destination that it shows you in your heart, without you even trying to see. Then, embrace the pitfalls and roadblocks that this life throws at you with grace. Embrace every emotion that comes with it with grace.
Treat your emotions like your children that you have to nourish and nurture – sometimes whiny and difficult, sometimes, all lovey-dovey and cute.
Life is going to test you
No matter how far you try to run. No matter how blessed your life makes you. Sooner or later, it shall throw it all at you. Trust me, you will not want it. You will want to scream and cry, and you will. But you will have no choice.
It is like being in quicksand. You will want to come out of it by pushing it too hard, but the more you do that, the more you drown.
So yes, you will have literally no choice.
You can think your emotions all you want
You can really go on thinking and thinking all you want. You can try to make a sense of all those storms in you. You can try to make sense of life.
Why did I do this? Why didn’t I do it like this? Why did this happen to me? Why is life so cruel to me? Why is everyone happy but me? Why are everyone’s lives happy but mine?
What wrong did I do to anyone? Why did I deserve so much pain? Am I even worthy of anything nice in life?
Feeling numb
How much should I get so that I can finally feel enough? When does gratitude feel enough?
At times, you can’t feel it, can you? All you feel is a numbness etching down your spine, to your very core.
You try and try really hard to feel hope, calm, and gratitude. But all you feel is fear and anxiety running down your spine as if it will create mansions out of that very fear and guilt in you!
We get so lost in being lack of what we don’t have that we fail to see what we have
As we discussed, we want what we want so badly that we fail to see the bits and pieces that we already have.
We try to look for the entire puzzle when we already have the small pieces laying behind us.
We try to embrace the entire ocean of happiness when we have a half-full glass. How can we even fathom the entire ocean? A tiny speck of dust in this entire Universe, aren’t we?
We have such harsh commitments with ourselves that we fail to see how unrealistic they were, until we find our bags empty, until we find ourselves alone.
What is that agony?
What is that frustration in us? We are so lost behind. We have nothing with us.
What if we fall in the process of rising? Haven’t we gone higher in the process? Lest we’d still be at the shore, below the mountain, had we kept calculating our perfections.
What is your path to success?
Do we go around jumping mountains? Do we sit and relax, waiting for things to happen? What do we do?
Listen to others? Trust me, I may not be able to tell you the path to your success. But this is a definite path to failure and frustration that shall haunt you forever.
You can’t make everyone happy, not even your loved ones. All you can do is love them. In this love, you can’t be sane by abandoning yourself in the corners.
What is that constant and recurring anxiety in you?
What is that depression in you? Where you feel like every moment of life is worthless, that there seems to be no happiness in anything that you do? That anxiety that has always been there, and do you know what – you realised its existence very late. All the more, you live in denial!
It was like that unwanted guest that always lived, that was eating you from within, but you didn’t know that you were being tormented. You always felt something was wrong. You tried to fix it with work, ambition, and being alone.
They do work, don’t they? Hiding yourself from the world and its challenges. Keep yourself hidden, as that’s the only safe place to be. But life demands that you step out. Not all the time, but it commands you to mingle, and maybe see a different world that your heart has always shown you.
Tell me, can I go on and on
Isn’t this true with our minds as well? It is so great at building stories. It will justify everything that you shall ask it to.
You tell it that you are stupid, it will show you evidences. You tell it you can’t do it, it will show you and prove it to you like the efficient lawyers who shall pin point and identify all the loopholes to save you.
Sitting with your abandoned parts
Then, you tell it that you can do it, and it’s all worth it. Do you know what it shall do?
It shall first push you deep into the ocean. Trust me, it is going to take you to places in your life that you had long abandoned, those you had buried deep within, so that you don’t see them ever again.
As you shall sit with yourself, you will find you even more scarier. All those feelings at thoughts will come back at you, fighting you together, and you shall find yourself alone – in the voices of this world, of your loved one, of your past, and future, of your present.
It will tell you that you are not good enough. You are not worthy of love, greatness, and success. It shall not let you believe no matter how hard you try.
It shall give you an etching feeling within you that has lingered for years. The fact is that you have become so comfortable in the comfort of these uncomfortable feelings. You can’t see the monsters in you.
You can’t find them.
You go on and on as if this life is going to throw mountains at you, crushing you under the rocks.
Trust me, it won’t.
All the horrors that live within us feed from us. We are the hosts to the parasites. They take it all from us.
The Mindset Reset
You see a challenge or opportunity. You cry for days or years. You fall and get up or you remain at the rock bottom.
This life pushes you into the darkness and you stay there scared, helpless, and hidden; or you get up with those bleeding and bruised legs and find light.
You see the thorns or the flower. You jump in the water, or you go boating, and as you paddle. You put your hands in the water. You feel the water splash on your body. You feel the extravagance and abundance of this life.
Listening to your inner voices
Don’t believe me. Don’t come to me looking for the answers.
Let your being answer it for you. Let your voices answer you. As then, no one shall be able to stoop you low.
As none of the voices is louder, harder, or stronger than yours.
Are you feeling lost?
Take a journey within.
What are Feeling Like a Failure in Life Quotes?
Find Feeling Like a Failure in Life Quotes below:
- Treat your emotions like your children that you have to nourish and nurture – sometimes whiny and difficult, sometimes, all lovey-dovey and cute.
- What if we fall in the process of rising? Haven’t we gone higher in the process? Lest we’d still be at the shore, below the mountain, if we had kept calculating our perfections.
- You can’t make everyone happy, not even your loved ones. All you can do is love them. In this love, you can’t be sane by abandoning yourself in the corners.
- You try and try really hard to feel hope, calm, and gratitude. But all you feel is fear and anxiety running down your spine as if it will create mansions out of that very fear and guilt in you!
- All the horrors that live within us feed from us. We are the hosts to the parasites. They take it all from us.
FAQs
1. How can I come to terms with failure?
Coming to terms with failure begins with accepting what happened without allowing it to define who you are. Acknowledge the disappointment, understand what you can learn from the experience, and give yourself permission to move forward. Failure can be painful, but it can also reveal what needs to change and where you want to grow.
2. How can I help someone who feels like a failure?
Listen to them without immediately trying to fix everything. Remind them that one setback does not define their worth or their future. Instead of comparing their life with others, encourage them to focus on what they have learned and what small step they can take next. Sometimes, being heard is the first step toward feeling hopeful again.
3. How do I accept being a failure in life?
You do not need to accept the idea that you are a failure. Instead, accept that you have experienced failure, made mistakes, or fallen short of certain goals. There is an important difference between saying “I failed at something” and “I am a failure.” The first describes an experience; the second turns it into an identity.
4. How can I cope with constant failure?
If failure feels constant, step back and look at the pattern rather than judging yourself. Ask what is not working, what you can control, and whether your goals need to be changed or approached differently. Give yourself room to recover and measure progress through small steps instead of expecting immediate success.
5. How can I deal with feeling like a failure in life?
To deal with feeling like a failure in life, separate your current circumstances from your identity. A setback, rejection, mistake, or missed goal does not determine your worth. Reflect on what happened, learn what you can, and focus on what you can do next. Your present situation is a chapter of your life, not the whole story.
Conclusion
Failure can make us question everything about ourselves. We begin to believe that one mistake, one rejection, or one unfulfilled dream says something permanent about who we are.
But you are not the worst thing that has happened to you.
Learning how to deal with feeling like a failure in life means learning to see failure as an experience rather than an identity. You can learn from it, change direction, begin again, and still create a meaningful life.
You may not be where you wanted to be today. That does not mean you will remain there.
Your story is still being written.
Check out more posts:
How to Find Meaning in Difficult Times: A Spiritual Journey
🦋 Finding Yourself Shayari in English to Begin Your Journey of Self-Discovery
